All I Ever Wanted
by BigTimeRushLover123
Summary: Logan can't stand Kendall being with Jo, he needs to date Kendall, he will do anything to get her away from him, and move closer himself. Not good at writing I dont think but you can be the judges of that :


**AN: Hi everyone. I'm not really a writer and obviously not good but I wanted to try to write a story so here goes. Review please tell me what you think about it please.**

**Chapter 1: Love Lasts A Lifetime**

Everything was wrong. It was ALL wrong. Kendall was dating the bitch that I can't stand, her name is Jo Taylor and she is the worst person I have ever met. Although she really isn't a bitch, I hate her because she is dating Kendall. MY Kendall. No one could ever do enough to deserve him, especially her, but I won't ever be able to do anything about it because Kendall is straight. He could never be gay, and I doubt he is bi. But me, I'm just Logan, a small nerd that can't get a girl as everyone says, but in this case a boy. Kendall could never love someone like me, he is too perfect for me. Even is he was gay he would never like me, I'm not good enough for him, or anyone else thinking about that.

My name is Logan Mitchell and I am a horrible best friend. I help everyone I can, that's not the issue, but I'm horrible because I'm in love with my best friend. I have loved him ever since I laid eyes on him when we were little. Some people don't believe in love at first sight, I didn't either, until then. He was the most beautiful little blonde boy I had ever seen in my life, and I could just feel that someday we would be best friends, and I suppose it was better than nothing. It was a day at the park when me and Kendall were both 8.

_**Flashback**_

_It was just a normal day where my mom would take me to the park, when the new kid __**Kendall Knight**__ moved to our small town in Minnesota. I had known I was gay since I was born, it was something I knew. I didn't question it because I talked to my parents about it and they said there was nothing wrong with loving another boy as long as I knew that some people might not be so accepting. So I ended up growing up without grandparents because they were extremely homophobic, but back to the point, as soon as I saw him I walked up to him and introduced myself._

_ "Hi, I'm Hortense Mitchell but you can call me Logan, it is my middle name." Logan sheepishly said._

_ "Hello, I'm Kendall Knight and you can call me anything you want Logie." Kendall said flirtaciously. Yes I was gay and thought Logan was the cutest boy on the planet. I hope he didn't overthink the cute nickname._

_ "Umm Logie? Logan whispered._

_ "Oh I'm sorry you don't like that, I'm sorry I just um- well I kinda- u-u-um wanna be friends and I like to give nicknames to all my friends, but if you don't like it I can stop." Kendall whimpered_

_ "It's not that Kendall I just, um no one has ever given me a nickname before, even my parents still call me Hortense."_

_ "Oh, okay Logie." Kendall whispered and went to play with his Logie._

_**End Flashback**_

Even then Logan loved kendall and he wasn't planning on stopping anytime soon, even though Kendall had Jo, he would never give up, and this was the one thing in life that Logan could be proud of, loving his best friend was a challenge, but was also amazing, and Kendall didn't even notice him, and most likely never would.

Every time he saw his Kendall kiss Jo, he felt his heart break a little more. Logan wasn't exactly normal, he cut himself. The first time he cut was when Kendall tried to win Jo's heart, he just had to get the pain of his best friend dating her out of his system. He knew it was bad for you, and he even knew that it wouldn't make his problems go away, but he did it anyway, because he couldn't deal with Kendall moving on and he wanted to kill himself, but he knew it wouldn't solve anything. He knew it would just make things hard for his family, his friends, and most importantly his Kendall, he didn't want to do anything to hurt Kendall, even if he unintentionally hurt him first.

Kendall didn't know he cut, and if he did he probably would overreact, so he made sure Kendall didn't know. He would cut when Kendall was gone, when he was gone, or anytime he wasn't around. He didn't want to hurt himself, but he couldn't help it. Sometimes when he couldn't find a razor to do the job with, he would burn himself instead, he didn't care what but he would fine someway somehow to hurt himself. He couldn't stop, the pain felt so good, it covered up his feelings, he used to be sad and depressed and people could start to notice until around the time he started cutting himself. He made the depression go away, it masked his pain and made him seem normal. He hated that he did it but he did.

Kendall was way too busy with Jo work and everything else more important than Logan in his life, and Logan knew it wasn't like that, he was just extremely busy, and it wasn't that they didn't hangout anymore. They just didn't hang out as much as they used to and Logan was tired of it. He was tired of Jo, he was tired of everyone else getting in his way of his unclear path to Kendall. He might have been a little more sure if he had no one in his way and he could have a little time to think, but he had to get to Kendall before he gave himself to her, no matter how he did it, he could not let Jo steal his Kendall away completely. He knew that they had done things, I mean come on. They had been together almost a year, a couple doesn't go that long being together without doing anything sexual. He knew that his Kendall was still innocent, because something that big, he would tell his best friends because he would have been so excited.

Finally, there was Camille Roberts, Logan's best friend at the Palm Woods, and his on again off again girlfriend. She was a crazy girl, but Logan didn't like her. He felt bad about it, but it was for the best, he didn't exactly like her and just used her as a cover so no one discovered his true feelings about Kendall. If anyone knew how he felt he would be destroyed. Kendall would find out and hate him, and then James and Carlos would hate him because he loved his best friend. He knew it was wrong of course, but he needed this. It was horrible to do that to someone but he had no choice, and was actually thinking about telling Camille about this so he could get the guilt off his chest.

He knew she was cool, and might not care and help him, but she was also crazy and could explode at any second. She could get mad about Logan using her and then tell the whole Palm Woods his secret. He didn't want to take that chance, because he couldn't. If anyone ever found out about his crush, he would probably kill himself, because it would be humiliating. He knew people would call him names and some people would even beat him up and some of the worse people would give death threats, some parents for him putting thoughts into their children's minds. But the worst of people, would actually try to kill him for being the way he is.

Logan knew what he had to do, he had to get Kendall to love him. He didn't know how to do it, and didn't know if he even could do it, but he had to get Kendall for himself and finally get him away from that bitch Jo. He loved Kendall and would do anything to get to him, in any way he could, but he needed more, because he knew that love lasts forever.

**AN: I'm sorry about the boring chapter, but I had to get them introduced and everything and all that stuff, please review and let me know what you think of the story so far, I will end up trying to update twice to three times a week and if I can't its because of school. I'll let you all know if school gets too busy and I have a project or something, I have to finish one now so I don't know about this week, but maybe you'll get lucky, but with my writing… its not exactly lucky.**


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